♪♪
♪ It's gonna get a little weird ♪
♪ Gonna get a little wild ♪
♪ I ain't from 'round here ♪
♪ I'm from another dimension ♪
♪ Gonna get a little weird ♪
♪ Gonna have a good time ♪
♪ I ain't from 'round here ♪
♪ I'm from another, whoo-hoo ♪
♪ Yeh-heah ♪
♪ I'm talking puppies ♪
♪ Pa, pa, pa, pa, pa, pa, pa, pa ♪
♪ Ooh ♪
♪ It's gonna get a little weird ♪
♪ Gonna get a little wild ♪
♪ I ain't from 'round here ♪
♪ I'm from another dimension ♪
Okay, you need to hold still.
One more second. It needs to be perfect.
Mm. Mm. Mm-hmm!
How do I look?
Super pretty!
Oh, no.
What's the matter? You don't like it?
No, I know I look amazing, it's just...
I can't go back to St. Olga's like this!
I gotta come clean!
Uh-uh!
If you tell those girls that you have been lying
about being a princess, they will destroy you.
I still can't believe they want to give me an honorary degree.
Ugh. I know I inspired a generation and all,
but I can't keep lying!
Whatever. It's your funeral.
Hey, goat, just because you're invisible
doesn't mean I can't hurt you!
Oh, we're here. Mm.
Come on, ladies.
You're having a princess problem.
Yeah, I'm having a princess problem.
Okay, stand up straight.
Arms forward!
And exhale!
Exhale!
Oh! Well, you've obviously done this before.
Okay. I can't do this.
Princess Turdina, where you going?
-Ahh! -Sign my poster!
-Sign my cat!
Sign my face!
Okay, people, don't crowd her!
Princess Turdina! It is truly an honor.
Oh, please, you don't have to--
We can't wait to show you what we've done with this place.
Whoa!
Welcome to Utopia!
Where am I?
Oh, it's so beautiful!
Wow, this is, uh...
really something.
Oh, we got rid of all those oppressive classes about manners
and "please" and "thank you" and all that other trash.
We have our own curriculum now!
Brunch and... party.
When do you sleep?
Oh-ho-ho, don't worry about it!
You know, sometimes structure isn't a bad thing!
-I just think that rules have a place...
Yeah, but you told us to never conform!
If you weren't being honest about who you are,
then this whole school would be built on a lie!
Oh, what I meant to say was rules have a place...
in the garbage! Hah-hah!
Oh, hah-hah! Oh, oh, good one.
That was... Oh, you had me.
Here's some princesses hard at work on their brunch final.
We don't believe in grades, no, we don't, just pancakes.
I love learning!
These are the whispering gardens, our designated gossip area,
because a princess's voice shall not be silenced!
Oh, my gosh, did you hear that Beatrice and Alfred broke up again?
Oh, no way!
And this is where we have our party class
to celebrate our freedom from the reign of Miss Heinous!
I see what you're seeing. It's cooler at night.
This is the hallway of Turdina!
Whoa.
This is the very first Turdina poster we hung up.
All of your T-shirts and all of your dolls
and a lock of your hair and a poster of your movie!
Oh, I gotta get a DVD of that!
This is too much!
Are you kidding? We owe this whole school to you.
You showed us that all princesses
don't have to fit into the same mold.
Pfft. No, I didn't.
And we're gonna show you our appreciation
by throwing you the biggest party this school's ever seen!
A party
Uh, Marco, isn't there something you wanted to tell these girls?
Oh! Yeah, um...
It's not criminal to be an individual!
-She said our catchphrase! -Yay!
Aw, you are way much more fun as Turdina!
Oh, my gosh! Oh, my gosh!
It's here! It's here!
What's here?
Check it out! Isn't it amazing?
Whoa.
In honor of the one princess who changed our lives,
we dedicate this to you!
I'm so beautiful.
I hope you do like it, Princess Turdina!
It took all year to save up enough to get it made!
We cleaned toilets on weekends for extra cash.
But it was worth it because you showed us
that there's another way to live.
Hey, hey, it's time
for a group selfie in front of the statue.
Oh, okay, sure.
Camera phone! Mm!
Are you... enjoying this?
Hey, this is the first time he's ever been popular!
Don't ruin it for him.
Well, he should tell the truth like a decent human being.
Hey, Turdina, can I talk to you for a sec?
Sure. Uh, bye, ladies!
Marco, I think you're running out of time to tell the truth.
Don't even listen to her, Turdina!
These princesses worship you!
Yeah, but they worship someone who doesn't exist.
Marco is the most organized, rule-abiding person I know.
Think of the party!
Yeah, they spent all that money for the statue.
I can't crush their spirits!
I'm just worried you might be letting
this attention get to your head!
What? That's not it!
This is for them, not for me!
Princess Turdina, come on!
It's time for your ceremony!
I can't believe I'm saying this,
but I'm going with Pony's advice.
Whoo! Good choice.
Oppression!
Eternal darkness!
Suddenly light!
Freedom!
Turdina!
Thank you, Princess Gwendolyn,
for that beautiful interpretive dance.
And now, the moment you've all been waiting for,
the woman herself, Princess Marco Turdina!
I present you this honorary St. Olga's degree.
Wow!
Turdina!
Dearest princesses,
congratulations on this wonderful school.
I know you see me as an idol,
but today you're my idols!
You embody everything that Princess Turdina...
uh, um, that I stand for--
not letting anyone force you to be something you're not,
living by your true colors,
loving who you are!
I'm proud to have inspired you to be brave,
even when it's scary.
And when being true to yourself
might mean disappointing thousands of people.
Um...
That's--
that's why I have to tell you the truth.
I, Princess Marco Turdina,
-am a boy!
Oh, no.
[all gasping, screaming]
Ooh!
It's Miss Heinous!
Princess Turdina is a fraud,
and I have the evidence to prove it.
-It's a tape...
That's right, I watched your video and saw your dark secret!
Oh, that phony confession I did?
Go ahead, show 'em! It's not real.
Oh, no, it's not...
but this is. Uh!
Turdina isn't a princess! She's a boy!
How'd you know about Rodrigo?
Whatever! That doesn't prove anything!
Princesses can be hairy!
Yeah! We believe in you, Turdina!
No.
I lied to you.
I am a boy.
Ooh!
Oop! I mean, ugh!
This, princesses, is why you need me
running St. Olga's.
Look where all this freedom got you--
living in filth
and championing a "hero"
who's been lying to you all along!
Henceforth, you must reinstate me as your schoolmaster!
You need me...
and I need you.
Wait, what did she just say?
Wait, no, why does it matter if he's a boy?
Nothing he said was wrong!
Yeah! He can think for himself and so can we!
He can be a princess if he wants to!
Turdina's a state of mind!
Silence! Silence!
Oh, I just got her right in the face!
Come on, girls!
-Yeah! -Free will!
No! No!
Spare me.
Get in the car!
Turdina lives!
Well, looks like Turdina's gone for good.
Yeah, because you took her away from us, you selfish monster!
You look like you can breathe a lot easier now.
Mostly 'cause I'm out of that dress!
That corset was killin' me!
Could we get a selfie with Marco Turdina, Boy Princess?
Sure.
Camera phone!
Oh, Smoochie's gonna be so jealous of this one!
Where is Smoochie, anyways?
♪♪
Ah! Oh, yeah, that's good!
Gemini, we gotta get more of this stuff.
Oh, yes, but I'm afraid this one is out of juice, milady.
Camera phone...
I know that, you fool!
I'm not talking about her!
Well, I'm happy to share some of mine with you.
No! I want the good stuff.
I'm coming for you, Princess Marco Turdina!
I don't mean to interrupt, milady,
but we say this all the time.
"I'm coming for you..."
Maybe we should just stay in tonight
and you can have a little Gemini fuel.
No. Nobody asked you.
Go get the car!
Uh, of course, milady.